“Islamically, There’s An Emphasis On Enjoying Physical Relationships” – Muslim Woman Writes The First Halal Guide To Intimacy
Stop everything else and read this.
A writer just penned a “halal sex guide” for women and is now being hailed as the Muslim answer to Belle De Jour. The US born author, who goes by her pen name Umm Muladhat, just released the Muslimah Sex Manual: A Halal Guide to Mind Blowing Sex, which is making waves all over because of the guide’s taboo-busting message that encourages women to enjoy and initiate physical contact (in other words, it teaches them how to have “mind blowing sex”).
The anonymous author, in an interview to The Observer, spoke about what inspired her to pen the book. It was a confession by a newlywed friend who spoke about her disastrous sex life that gave the author an idea to write this groundbreaking book. The friend’s inexperience in the art of lovemaking was the starting point of in journey.
The author stated, “I put an emphasis on having sex only with your spouse, but having the full range of sexual experiences with that spouse. Islamically, there’s an emphasis on enjoying physical relationships within the context of marriage, not just for procreation. It is the wife’s right that her husband satisfy her sexually”.
“My friend’s sex life was horrible. In fact, it was fast becoming non-existent. She had been a model Muslimah her entire life. Before marriage, she had never so much as held a non-mahram’s hand, let alone become physically intimate with one,” Umm Muladhat wrote on her website.
This no-holds barred book includes everything, from candid advice on kissing to cowgirl positions and includes chapter such as ‘Forced Sex Fantasies’, ‘How To Be a Freak in Bed’, and more.
Here are a few excerpts from the explosive book:
Start by making eye contact with your husband. Give him a small smile and a light touch before beginning the actual kiss. Maybe put your hand on his face or touch his leg. Make him anticipate the kiss.
After a while, you can morph this into a French kiss. Do this by slowly opening your mouth wider until you can put your tongue into his mouth and touch his tongue. Use your tongue. Tease him with light flicks. Go back and forth into each other’s mouths. Trace the edge of his lips with the tip of your tongue. Explore his mouth! Feel his gums and teeth with your tongue. Make sure to give him opportunity to reciprocate.
Don’t just kiss on the lips. He has other kissable parts too! Work on his neck and collarbone. Bite, but gently. Nibble his earlobe or neck. Maybe his bottom lip. If you’re adventurous, give him a hickey. Kiss his neck with a slightly open mouth. Suck in the skin. This will leave a mark so be careful where you do it!
Remember, a kiss is more than just your mouth. Use your hands. Don’t leave your hands limp in front of you or on your lap. Explore your husband’s body. Put your arms around his neck. Touch his arms. Run your hands down his back or chest. Run your fingers through his hair and massage his scalp. His body is exclusively yours for the rest of your marriage! Explore the goods!
Safe words are big in BDSM. This should be something other than “stop” or “no” because those words might be part of your roleplay where you’re just pretending to struggle against him. A good safe word to use is red/yellow/green. Think about it like traffic lights. Red means you need to stop. Yellow means you don’t need to stop but he should slow down. Green is to assure him to keep going. If you’re gagged, you should have some alternative to a stop word. This could be holding something in your hand that you drop to indicate you want to stop.
Start slow when you begin exploring BDSM. Very slow. Begin by just trying one thing and just that one. Then add in another. Don’t try too much at once. For example, let’s say you want to try getting blindfolded and getting whipped. Don’t try both together at first. Pick one. Let him spank you with a whip one time. Then, the next time, add in the blindfold. It might not seem like much but BDSM can quickly get overwhelming so take things slowly.
Umm wrote down all that she had learnt in the past 30 years alongside some tips and tricks from magazines and shared it with her friend. After a few days she met her friend again, who apparently had a “huge smile on her face” and who also asked her to write for other Muslim women.
She then wrote on word file and emailed it to her friend who shared it with other acquaintances. This news spread like wildfire and in no time people asked her pen a book on the same topic, because that would help eliminate all the taboos associated with sex that are fed to Muslim women while they’re growing up.
According to the author, a lot of Muslim women do not have a clue about what is permissible in Islam and that there is a general misconception that women shouldn’t enjoy sex. Usually “guilt associated with sex is drummed into women from childhood and it is portrayed as something dirty where women’s sexuality is often controlled”.
Apart form the lovely response the writer received after the release of Muslimah Sex Manual: A Halal Guide to Mind Blowing Sex, there are a lot of men who have been emailing her to consider a book that will help them please their wives in bed.