Like it or not, Balaji Telefilms’ shows were a huge part of many 90s kids’ upbringing. From the 8:30pm ‘Kasauti’ to the 10:30 pm ‘Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi’ and sometimes even the 11:30 pm ‘Kaahin Kissii Roz’ — most of us used these as excuses to stay up late and watch TV even on weekdays, because our parents were themselves so hooked.

With the advent of Netflix and other streaming services though, TV viewing is a far cry from the previous decades. There are hundreds of options to choose from now, even through your phone. But what if the clock was rolled on the most popular TV shows from the recent past and they were to be made by Balaji?

Since it’s Ekta Kapoor’s birthday on Thursday, here’s a bunch of fresh scripts from us as a gift to her:

Kahaani Har Engineer Ki (Big Bang Theory)

Science and research might not be a popular career choice in India, but you will definitely find all varieties of geeks on the front benches of engineering colleges across the country. It isn’t too unreal to imagine a desi fresh-out-of-college Leonard trying to woo a desi Penny while sharing the same building somewhere in Andheri East.

Kahin Toh Hogi (How I Met Your Mother)

Ted Mosby’s life in HIMYM makes for a perfect romantic melodrama, especially in the times of so many near-incels in the country. Won’t so many of our guys still be virgins had it not been for arranged marriages (refer to the comments section under any good-looking girls pictures on social media ICYMI)? It’s thus the right time to revive the Aamna Sharif-starrer yesteryear franchise ‘Kahiin Toh Hoga.’ But no Rajeev Khandelwal again, please!

Ye Dosti Hum Nahi Todenge (F.R.I.E.N.D.S)

The script of the sitcom would hardly need any major changing before adaptation for Indian audiences. Of course our beloved censor board would prefer minimising all sex-related jokes, but a sansakari version of friends still sounds quite bearable. The title though would at least have to represent Indian TV’s eternal obsession with Bollywood song titles.

Faulad: Faridabad Ki Aulad (Shameless)

Given the increasing popularity of female protagonists on Indian TV, a script like this would only rope in more TRPs. But again, the sex would have to be cut down. However, imagine Fiona (aka Faulad) living with a crazy family in Faridabad (completely plausible) and keeping things together in the best manner possible. 

Kachcha Chitta (Breaking Bad)

It’s a scorching summer morning in Punjab. Warinder Singh just finds that he has cancer, but also has a young family that will survive him. One thing leads to the other and he decides to tap into the cocaine market in the state, giving the consumers the best coke in town. This actually is quite a brilliant idea; Ekta are you listening?

Kachehri, Vakeelon Ka Tashan (Suits)

Meghan Markle’s wedding into the Royal Family of London has gotten the show enough attention, in case there wasn’t enough already. In fact, ‘Suits’ has been one of the most popular USA Network shows in India and would definitely make for a more dapper legal drama than ‘Siddhant’ or ‘Adaalat.’ But the real question is, can it better ‘CID’?

Sinhasan…Ek Shadyantra (Game of Thrones)

One can hardly recollect a memorable mythological fiction show on Indian TV since ‘Alif Laila.’ But a high production recreation of George RR Martin’s popular book adaptation could just change that. And if Dharma Productions decides to pitch in and raise the budget to like that of ‘Baahubali,’ who knows what could come out of it.

Design: Anshul Bhansali

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