So you cheated on your partner, and you didn’t think you would get busted. First things first, it’s bad to cheat and we don’t endorse it as cool or forward-thinking. But, we do understand the basic human nature to make mistakes. Maybe you were too drunk, maybe she was too hot, maybe you had a rough fight and wanted to take revenge by sleeping with someone else. Whatever the reason is, it’s best to do a few things before you let the incident end your relationship.
Firstly, cut off all communication from the other person. You have to grit it out for a long time, and a mere ‘I won’t do it again’ isn’t going to cut it. If you really love your partner, and she wants the relationship to exist, then you should be ready to face a fiery few months or even the first year.
Don’t expect romance to bloom suddenly after the incident, as patch-ups don’t happen by just saying a few empty words. Mean what you say, and let time reveal that your apology is heartfelt. It might be stormy now, but it can’t rain forever. It might be uncomfortable now, but it’s going to get better.
You’ll only freshen the wounds if you and your partner keep referring to this incident again and again. Also, tell your partner that you’re willing to change, and if she accuses you, then she is only throwing rocks at you while you’re climbing a mountain.
A therapist can really help, as a few anti-depressants might be needed to settle some nerves after such an incident.
What you’ve done is wrong, but then, you’ve made the effort to repent. Appreciate yourself for that, practice some self-compassion. If you keep hurting yourself with guilt, you are not going to make things better for you or your partner.