Like Having Sex With The Earth? You’re Not Alone

Would you be kinder to the Earth if it turned you on?

Yes, you read that right. Take a seat and read on about the ecosexuality.


The Urban Dictionary defines ecosexual as “a term describing a person, in a dating sense, who is social and environmentally conscious”. In the same vein, it also states that an ecosexual could also be someone who likes to “bang rocks and trees instead of chicks”. As with all things, ecosexuality could mean many things compared to which portion of the scale you most relate with. While there are some who like taking walks in the park or swimming naked in the oceans, there are others who push their genitals into a tree or ejaculate into the ground.

“Flowers are tree genitals. Basically, you’re looking at porn,” says former pornstar turned X-rated feminist Annie Sprinkler to Stephanie Theobald of The Guardian. The basic idea behind ecosexuality as envisioned by the likes of Sprinkle is that you no longer consider the Earth as a ‘Mother’ but more like a lover. Why? Because while mothers have to put up with a whole lot of shit from their offspring, we are always eager to please our lovers.

You don’t necessarily have to have sex with the Earth, you can whisper sweet nothings to it or rub the mud sensuously. According to Women’s Health Mag, ecosexuals consider ecosexuality to be a sexual identity. In fact, Sprinkle and her partner Beth Stephens have even conducted ecosexual weddings. While it may seem bizarre, the whole premise of ecosexuality is actually based on a deep desire to save the planet.


Many ecosexuals see sex as a powerful tool to motivate people to focus on the climate. “If you’re running from floods, you won’t have any time for sex,” author Stefanie Iris Weiss states, according to Vice. Does she have a point there? Well, that’s for you to decide.

(Header credits: Screengrab from ‘God Is A Woman’ by Ariana Grande)

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